Winter Solace

Beautiful snowy road in northern Germany, photo by my wonderful sister-in-law Melanie.  No snow in SoCal!

I love all the stress of Christmas, fa la la la laa.  One week until Christmas and I’m completely ready!  Sadly, I’m not feeling it at all.  California is still burning, the girls are up to their elbows in “projects” for school, Hubby’s work is requiring a lot of extra hours and I’m struggling to keep everyone on track.  Four days until break and my girls aren’t the only ones’ sick of getting up in the morning!

I hope I’m not the only one feeling overwhelmed by the end of the year and underwhelmed by the spirit of Christmas!  Since moving to California 12 years ago, I struggle to accept bright sunny Christmas days.  I long for the silence of snow covered trees and lawns punctuated by the occasional flit of a sparrow.  Winter is a time of introspection.  The earth is quiet, foliage dormant.  The earth is fallow as the soil regains valuable nutrients lost in the past season.

The days are short and the nights long.  We have time to ponder the past year, revel in our successes and gauge our failures.  I like to assess my positive changes and commit to maintaining those.  Begrudging, I reevaluate my failures.  Are they worth another try?  What can I do to improve? 

I’m working to be more present with my daughter’s.  I turn the TV off after dinner.  I put down my computer (and Kindle and phone).  I dropped social media apps from my phone.  I set aside time so spend with each girl.  I keep my eye on their school assignments, talk daily about what’s happening at school, in class.  I will continue to maintain an open pipeline of communication.  More and more important as they enter middle and high school.

Waiting for Christmas cards!

My budgeting skills, however, are in dire need of improvement.  I discovered budgeting printables online and have been tracking our daily and monthly expenses for the past two months.  I found the Frugal Fanatic.  This blog offers several budgeting printables that I’ve found to be quite helpful.  I recommit myself to gain and maintain control of our finances this year.

More importantly, this is a time to reconnect with my family and friends who live far away.  I love to send Christmas cards.  Sadly, this is a dying art.  Nevertheless, I persevere.  Bright cards, complete with a short family letter and pics of my girls.  So many people complain about family letters, but I like the check in.  The reconnection.  I’m not able to visit everyone I miss so heartily, so these letters keep me connected to their lives. 

I love the long cold nights of winter.  The solemnness of snow-covered cities and country hills.  Darkest winter evokes reverence.  A time of contemplation.  I time of quiet and rest.